My New Exercise Routine

24 toe-touches to pick up crayons off the floor before Andrew tries to eat them

5 squats from the washer to the dryer

18 laps around the kitchen island to make and serve lunch (repeat at dinner time)

4 biceps curls while lifting toddler out of crib/high chair/cardboard box/miscellaneous sticky situations (repeat at intervals throughout the day)

10 ankle stretches during stop-and-go of drive-thru pick-up line at Covenant 

One mini wrestling/diaper-changing session and jog to garage trash can (repeat 6-8 times; include extra jog to toilet for solid-waste-dumping at least three times)

Arm stretches to turn on or off sink faucet for hand or dishwashing (repeat every ten minutes, or more often as needed)

45 minutes of mostly silent meditation while waiting for homework to be completed (with stern looks at children at intervals)

Short sprints across the house or up the stairs to cut Andrew off from whatever disastrous fate he's tempting

45 minutes of mostly silent meditation while listening to 4-year-old monologues

5 trips up and down the stairs for post-bedtime infractions

Full body stretch on bed around 9:30pm (passing out optional but highly likely)